Real relationship is virtually impossible in a large crowd, without breaking down into smaller, more simple assemblies.

Just as we cannot live the complete life that God wants alone, we also struggle with living that complete life in a large group. There are various reasons for this, however, the most glaring reason is that it is so easy to “fake it” in a large crowd. We can blend, hide and whatever else to avoid a real venerability and relationship in a crowd. In order to experience real intimate relationship and true biblical fellowship, we must become involved in each other’s lives. To do this we must get to know the other people deeply. This just doesn’t happen in a large crowd. Don’t misunderstand that to mean a large church cannot have true fellowship/relationship. However, it will not happen in the weekend “large” worship service gathering. It most likely happens in the small group/Sunday School or discipleship training classes, or in some other small group format. This should also not be misunderstood to mean that you cannot worship God in a large crowd. You most certainly can. As a matter of fact, you can’t experience corporate worship by yourself. And it seems the more people you have in a corporate worship, the more awesome it seems. Hey, even the church in Acts chapter 2 met in the “temple courts” as well. I don’t discount the coming together of large groups of the body of Christ. I am just saying that it takes very little commitment and discipline (root word of disciple) to be involved in a corporate worship. However, it takes an investment of your life into another life to be involved in deep, biblical fellowship with another brother or sister in Christ. You cannot make disciples by having them attend a huge group gathering once per week.
If a large church is truly growing spiritually, there will be some type of small group ministry or outlet where people can experience a “fellowship of the heart” as John Eldredge calls them in “Waking the Dead”. It gets back to the same reason that one pastor cannot possibly be the pastor/shepherd to more than a small group of people. Biblically, it is the local church leadership’s job to equip the saints for the work of the ministry, not simply administrate the programs and be the CEO of the local body. In order to equip the saints, the leadership must equip a small group that will eventually be leaders of other small groups, which will lead others...and they will in turn lead others....you get the point. That process called discipleship is how we accomplish the mission of the Church to “make disciples”. It is virtually impossible to do in a large group. So why to pastor’s lay in bed at night a pray for incredible crowds? Well, partly because they want as many people as possible to hear and receive the message of Christ. There are others, if they are honest, who would like to be the “big-dog” on the block in their particular Christian circle. Don’t get me wrong here; I am not being critical of God’s anointed. I am simply stating facts of pastors (and other humans) that I have met in every town or association that I have served as youth pastor for the last 10 or so years. I am not only talking about them, and how susceptible they are to P-R-I-D-E; I am also talking about me (and you) and any human. History teaches us that it is pride that can remove kings and presidents...and pastors. Anyone who is up in front of a large group of people (even small groups at times) can become addicted to the appreciation and applause of mankind. The larger the crowd, the greater the temptation. That is why I would like to keep our crowd small enough to fit into my living room.
In most churches, the weekend worship service is still the big focus. I am not sure that it should be that way. I think that it is important to have a worship service, but I think it is far more important to worship God with the living of your life in a way that honor’s Him. I just don’t understand why most churches make the “big” weekend worship service the entry point for potential church members. I can go to most churches in our area (the middle of the Bible belt) and join their church or at least attend the weekend worship service for years, and not ever really get to know anyone. Oh, there would be surface greetings and “how are you” smiles; however, there is no real relationship. My fear is that most church members are so afraid to let people into their real lives, because they will be exposed for the fraudulent Christian life they are living. If they is the case, it would explain many of the typical church problems, such as politics and control issues that are faced today in many churches. Why not make the worship service (big group) the last thing that guests are to attend. Let’s turn the pyramid upside down and let the guest enter at the small group level and after their discipleship process is in full swing, then have an all-group (meeting of all the small churches) worship gathering. Why do you think it is so awesome to meet with a group like promise keepers or a huge conference with many believers? It is because most of the people there are in a real relationship with Christ already. In most churches (according to Billy Graham) many of those in regular attendance are not even a Christian! You can’t worship God if you are not in right relationship with Jesus Christ.
These are just some thoughts and ramblings of a former youth pastor, who many think have flipped his lid. I am more inclined to say that God has taken hold of my life and turned it upside down! And I LOVE IT! Keep reading and let me know what you think.